My 10 Commandments of Writing

Today's Earworm:
Today's Date: May 8, 2015

So I know that I kind of died there for a while and I am sorry. Life wasn't happy with me, but that's about normal for me.

I'm kind of doing a twitchtwitchdie thing over here in regards to pain but that's about normal.

But! I wanted to get back into doing something interesting and this is what I decided to do!

My 10 Commandments of Writing

Disclaimer: My commandments might not work for you. Just so you know.

1) Practice. Practice. Then Practice some more.

When people ask me how I can write so many words in a week (on average about 5K when life isn't sucking my soul) they always give me this look when I say "Practice".

I'm not joking you when I say that. It was practice that trained me into writing every day in some way. I may write only a single side of a piece of paper a day for a week, but I'm getting words down. I don't let a block on one story stop me from writing.

I simply put that story to the side for a short time and work on another story. And while I write, I talk with a friend or two about the knot that I've found in my story. I don't stop practicing.

I write, always.

2) Write. Even when you don't want to, write.

The only time that I can't write is when I'm so drugged up that my eyes are going crosseyed and I'm falling asleep at my desk. And that's pretty darn rare.

I don't let my life hold me back. I write in some way or another. Just like I have practiced since the day that I picked up a pen and started to write horrible poems.

3) Ignore those who have only seen part of the manuscript. 

They know nothing.

I can not tell you how often someone has read a chapter or two of a story and the utterly fucked it over for me by butting into what I'm writing.

"Have you done this yet?"

"Have you changed that yet?"

It really kills an idea for me. I do continue to write on that story but I tend not to show it ever again. It has taken me years to get to a point where I just kind of ignore requests to see even full manuscripts until I'm ready to show someone something.

4) Ignore those who think they know your style and what you're trying to do.

This ties in with number 3. People tend to think they know what you're writing or how you write. They think they do and most often than not, they're wrong. And it can really mess with someone when that person tries to butt in.

Especially when it's someone who is just learning what their writing style is or what they want to do with a story.

5) Ignore the urge to go back and edit before at least 10 chapters.

This is mostly because after the first 10 chapters, I have a pretty good idea of what I'm going to do with the story and need to go back to edit some details into the story or change some around.

Or in the case of Bad Dog, rewrite a chapter into two chapters so that the information dump is more of an information stream.

But if I don't wait, I tend to have to rewrite and edit more than two or three times, which is a waste of time and space, and I don't enjoy wasting my time when I can write on things. Thus, I wait until I have a minimum of ten chapters written.

6) Write what you want to write. 

I don't write to be popular. I know that a lot of my stuff is very niche, very small in a lot of ways. But that's fine. I write what I write because I enjoy it. I write what I write because out there someone else will enjoy it. I write what I write because I want to read it myself.

And I can't find it anywhere. Thus, I write what I want to write.

7) Ignore people who say you need to write this because it's all the rage.

This is tied to number 6. I said that i don't write because I want to be popular.

And I don't. Popularity is a fickle, fickle bitch and not something I want to deal with. If I become popular...people will just have to deal with what I write because apparently I'm doing something good.

No, I will not write some bored housewife wish fulfilment that is a badly written attempt at the BDSM world without a drop of research.

Yes, I will write (or try to) write a BDSM homo-erotic story that is researched until my eyes bleed...and then researched some more. I have connections who are willing to tell me in great detail what goes on in that world.

No, I will not write about a 'vampire' that falls in love with some simpering Self-insert to cater to the masses.

Yes, I will write about a vampire who is a smug little bastard who finds a half angel and has a stalker ex who wants to bleed his half angel out just because, hey, blood. And a cold corpse to fuck. (I never said that my stories had SANE villains, people.)

Yes, I will write what I want to write, and fill my niche with fans who like my stuff and I'll let the bullshit...be far, far away from me.

8) Don't limit yourself.

I will not limit myself to one genre, type of character, or type of plot. I will explore whatever interests me and I will learn about each thing that catches my attention.

Because I apparently like to research and learn.

9) Don't stop writing damnit! 

Nope, can't stop writing. Nope.

10) Do what you need to do to get those words.

I will do whatever I can do to get my words.

I will listen to music, or a movie, or marathon something creepy on Youtube.

I will hand write, write in Google Docs, or I will babble about a story to my friend who likes to watch me write.

I will get those fucking words!

One way. Or the other.

So! I hope you enjoyed this little peek into my world. I know I had fun with this one and I hope to have more fun with more posts like this as time goes along.

April 2017 and What Has Been Going On

Today's Earworm: Narcissistic Cannibal (cover) by Earlyrise
Today's Date: April 18, 2017

So I'm pretty sure that you've noticed that I haven't posted a new blog for two weeks in a row right?

Eh, I'm sorry that I didn't but I kind of needed to just stop and get away from things. I needed to relax and focus on my writing and not my blog as I've been doing for most Sunday's since I started a long term Monday Blog Series.

I had to stop and focus on...me.

I've spoken about my mental issues, including ADD and OCD, but I don't think that I've talked about the issues that I have with Depression, Anxiety and panic attacks. At least not in detail.

No, I'm not going to talk about those in detail this post so don't worry.

I am going to talk about what has been going on in my writing life and what I'm shifting around, fixing up and thinking about in regards to it.

After my lovely friend left last Sunday, I kind of crashed. And hard. I didn't write all that much during the first week of Camp and the second week kind of was meh, but this week so far has been good. I haven't actually worked on either Black Veiled Saviour or Bad Dog. At least not in getting words so far.

I've been working on other things that need to be focused on. But I have, surprisingly, gotten over 16 thousand words. I have dropped my word counts down to 30K because of the rocky start to my writing, but shit happens.

I'm also doing a lot of rewriting and going over information with various stories. It's seemed to be working well enough for me, so I'm happy with that.

I just need to finish off a few things. Get them off of my long, long list. Which is driving me up a wall. A big, craggly wall.

But I'm doing it.

So thank you for understanding. Tune in next week for the update on the stories and after that I'll be talking about what I'm thinking of doing for the next few posts.

How Stories Come to Be For Me

Today's Earworm: The Damaged Ones by 9ELECTRIC
Today's Date: February 27, 2017

So I was reading Stephen King's The Bazaar of Bad Dreams story collection and before each story is a note about that story.

Well, in the note before the story, A Death, which is story 6, he talks about how sometimes stories come to him. He also talks about how a story comes to him in parts, a cup and a handle in the note before story 3, Batman and Robin Had an Alteration.

This...this sparked a thought in my head because he talked about how he often had visions of a kind of a character gathering. He talked about The Hair of Harold Roux by Thomas Williams which offered a metaphor, or a parable if you want to think about it, where there is a fire with a single character sitting there. And more characters would come with more fuel for the fire until they're all shown by the fire.

Well, apparently for A Death, he saw a man with a man trying to read a newspaper by a kerosene lantern.

And then of course, I'm going "How do I come up with my stories?"

Thus, this blog came to be. Because I have talked about my Plot Hike (which is how I build a story up instead of the Plot Moutain) and somewhat on how I get my stories, I wanted to actually talk with you guys on how I come up with stories.

Note: I am publishing this blog post on my livejournal fanfiction update page, so if you somehow found it there, no, I'm not stealing my own post from myself. Don't worry.

So...how do I come up with my stories?

Actually, any kind of way.

I've been known to just randomly think up an idea. Take Black Veiled Saviour for example. It's a murder mystery with undertones of homosexual romance, and it's one of my favorite stories in work. And the idea was sparked by Black Veil Brides song Saviour. It gave me Bo, who is one of my main characters as he thought about his future lover, Alexx.

It was a very interesting prospect, so I went back and relistened to the song. This time, I got an image of Alexx, in his original form since he's since changed a few times, of him sitting down and writing a letter to a fan of his musical group.

I wrote that story and if you go to my livejournal, here, you can read it.

For a few other stories, they actually started out as a role play that I was doing with friends. Take Follow Me Down. It's what I call a modern day dark fantasy kind of story. It started out as a role play with a few friends that kind of bombed because some things went down and I don't speak with one or two of the people any more.

It was based off a darker version of the Alice in Wonderland world, but has since changed to a point where it's not based off of anything but itself and history for a few of the character types. I'm still world building and figuring out characters, but I have a good base for the story itself, which is nice.

I also just...daydream them into existence. I'll be listening to music and playing solitaire or I'll be watching something mindless (or anime, one of the two), and suddenly I'll get a scene in my head that I'll play out. It gives me a jump point to create a story from since it's usually the first chapter and/or scene in the story.

From there, I build the world accordingly and figure out the characters by writing small bits and pieces here and there.

It's all about what I'm doing at the time. Stories do tend to just pop up in my head and then disappear if I don't write them down. But if I'm meant to write or I write it down, I'll poke at it and figure out what I want to do it.

After all, I'm not Stephen King. I can't wait for the cup to my handle when it comes to my stories and novels guys. It just doesn't work well for me to just wait.

To note: Next monday I'll be starting my Camp Nano prepping for April! Yay! Fun times to come. I hope you take a few minutes and check out that blog post and join me in the fun of writing.

My question for you guys is: how does your stories come to you?

Monthly Writing Update - January 2017

Today's EarWorm:
Today's Date: January 31, 2017
Next Update: February 28, 2017

This is the first round of my Monthly Writing Up. This will happen on the last day of every month. That means if there is 28 days in a month, it will be on the 28th. If there are 30 days in a month, it will be on the 30th. If there is 31 days in a month, it will be on the 31st.

I'm sure that you get the idea yes?

Anyways, this is the first round and I'm still figuring out how I'm doing this, so work with me and comment if you find this easy to read.

Thank you.

I'm not really sure on how I will end up with the lay out but this is the first try. I'm pretty much going to do a day by day hit of what words I got.

So, let's start this round.

January 1: 1,579
January 2 to 5: No words. Busy
January 6: 250
January 7: 1,679
January 8 to January 11: No words
January 12: 1,868
January 13: 1,404, Edited
January 14 to January 16: No words
January 17: Edited, 203
January 18: No words
January 19: 1,596
January 20: 2.030
January 21:
January 22
January 23
January 24
January 25
January 26
January 27
January 28
January 29
January 30
January 31

The Holidays and The Writer

Today's EarWorm: This is Gonna Hurt by Sixx A.M.
Today's Date: January 9, 2017

So I'm sure that you noticed that there was no blog for the day of December 26, 2016. The reason for that is...

Well, I forgot.

I have a rather interesting list of reasons why I forgot, but some of them might come off as excuses.

1) Christmas. Yes, I was busy ALL day on December 25th. I was cooking a ham, fighting off a cold, teaching a dog with terrier and chihuahua blood not to go to the bathroom on my brand new carpeting (we're getting there), and my friend who spends Christmas with us was dealing with her jaw.

She went to the ER by the way. She's fine, just sore and grumpy.

2) Christmas Baking. Yes, I was baking for the rest of the month. I had most of the month's blogs all written out but wasn't sure as to what to write for that blog post. I was baking further into the month. And this leads us to reason number 3.

3) Flooring. We FINALLY got our flooring in. We got our carpet done on December 19th, two rooms, my bedroom and my mom's bedroom. And then they came in on the 23ed to do the rest of the flooring.

No. I will not deal with the company that made us wait 3 months to get our new flooring down. Yes, 3 months. Not cool and it stressed out both myself and my mom.

So we got it down, finally.

4) Just plain feeling like hell. Excuse the language but it's true. Between trying to get the flooring done so we could unpack our home and get it back to normal, and trying to cook, and write, and do all sorts of other things, life was not happy making.

I'm actually recovering still from all of that and drinking a lot of hot tea and eat good soup to help beat off the last of the ick.

It doesn't help that it has been scarily cold lately.

So what does this have to do with the holidays?

Well a lot. Especially if you're a writer who has a busy life going on. Or when life decides to smack you up side the head. Which kind of sucks really because it can kill your want to write.

Which isn't fun.

Yes, I hit my goal of an average of 5K a week for the 2016 year and I got things done, but I should have gotten more done. But life kind of sucks somedays.

And the holidays are a busy, busy time.

A New Year and a New List

Today's Earworm: Fear Not This Night by Freya Catherine
Today's Date: January 2, 2017

If you want to compare this list with the last list (2/1/2016) go here. There really isn't much change outside of me going more into details as to what the stories/series are going into and the state of each book.

Now that I've said that, HAPPY NEW YEAR! I hope that you are warm and cozy at this time and that life is treating you semi-well.

And that you're staying safe. Seriously you guys.

Me, I'm trying to get something done this year. I have a list, which will be at the end, of the  books I'm hoping to work on right now.

So let's go over what I have going on shall we?

And once again, the setup is this:

Title:
Genre:
Pairing styles: (M/M, Poly, F/F, M/F, none)
Books in the series (if a series):

Status

Minimum words planned for:
Notes on the story:

Rewriting/Editing/Note Taking

Title: Untitled
Genre: Romance
Pairing styles: Male/Male (M/M)
Books in the series (if a series): 1

Status: Rewriting

Minimum words planned for: 24,000 (1,100 words per chapter)
Notes on the story: This is still my Lex/Rose story and no I don't have any kind of title for it. But I have gotten through the note taking and have written out a new outline for it. It's somewhere around 24 chapters planned out. 

This story was originally 11 chapters in length and when I'm done with this first rewrite, I plan on printing it out to go through it and tear it apart. I do this because it allows me to get away from the computer to edit it without worry. So it's going to be very interesting.

Title: All You Need
Genre: Romance
Pairing styles: M/M
Books in the series (if a series): None

Status: Note taking/Outlining

Minimum words planned for: 11,000 to 22,000 (1,100 words per)
Notes on the story: In the current version of this story, there is 5 chapters. I want to expand it into something like 10 to 20 chapters in length.

I want to expand on the world and change the names of the characters and build up the history for a few chapters before I introduce the main characters. I have 5 chapters planned out already but I don't know if I'm going to keep them or replot those first chapters out. But I do know that I'll be rewriting and writing quite a bit when it comes to this story.

Title: Untitled
Genre: Romance
Pairing styles: M/M
Books in the series (if a series): None

Status: Noting

Minimum words planned for: No idea.
Notes on the story: This one I'm still making notes on because it's so old. I think I might have to print this one out and work from there. It's going to drive me up a wall, I can tell you that. 

Cause it's doing that to me now.

Series Already in the Works

Title: Shades of Red series
Genre: Horror/Paranormal Horror
Pairing styles: M/M, F/M,
Books in the series (if a series): Planned so far is 3

Status: Book 1 in rewrite/writing

Minimum words planned for: 50K (1,100 words min per chapter)

Notes on the story: Yes this series is still in the works, but I'm having quite a bit of fun with this story since my original story is printed out and I'm working from that along with the original file that I did find after the great Flashdrive Reformat. 

I am working on what book 2 is doing but outside of that, this particular story is coming along rather nicely.

Book 1: Crimson Shadows - WIP

Book 2: Drips of ?

Book 3: ?? 

Title: Honey Drops Series
Genre: Romance/Sci-fi/Fantasy
Pairing styles: M/M, F/M, Poly, F/F
Books in the series (if a series): 6 books planned plus a book filled with bits and stories that didn't make it into the main story line
Status: Book 1 - WIP
Notes on the story: This series is being a pain in the ass but I'm working on planning it out. It is still a total of six books plus another book that fills in stories that didn't make it into the main book series for whatever reason. Mostly stories that came to me as I wrote the story that fill in some history. Or gives you interesting bits of interactions between characters.

Bk 1: Nix's Story - In progress
Bk ?: Cho's Story
Bk ?: Kain's Story
Bk ?: ?? Story
Bk ?: ?? Story
Bk 6: Final Book

Title: A Living Zombie series
Genre: Dark Comedy/horror
Pairing styles: various
Books in the series (if a series): 2
Status: WIP
Minimum Words Planned For: 50K
Notes on the story: Big Bertha Rides Again!

Okay, inside joke if you don't hang out with us in the Forward Motion chat room or the Writing Groove chat room and J.A. Marlow is around.

But I have reintroduced myself to this story and I am going to work on this story. It's a lot of fun considering that this is pretty much "A zombie keeps his mind" kind of story. Which I've seen a few times out there (but I've never actually watched/read any of them seeing as I'm picky about my zombie movies/shows/stories).

I'm going to have fun with this though.

Book 1: WIP
Book 2: Planning

Title: Don't Look Series
Genre: Paranormal Horror
Pairing styles: Various (but not really a focus)
Books in the series (if a series): 4+ books
Status: Writing
Notes on the story: I actually started a new first book for this series called "Thread the Needle" which builds up the world into what it is in the main story. It will be going into the family's history and the cities history and all of the good things. So that's going to be a lot of fun to do because it's...going to get kind of sexual for this first book since a lot of the magic in the first book is sex magic.

But there will be other types so don't go thinking that this is a poor excuse to write smut you guys.

Bk 1: Thread the Needle - WIP
Bk 2: A Delicate Thread - WIP - On hold
Bk 3: Twine the Soul
Bk 4: Spin a Yarn

Title: The Ages Series
Genre: ...superheros?
Pairing styles: various
Books in the series (if a series): 8 books
Status: Writing
Minimum words planned for: 50K Per book
Notes on the story: I'm actually on chapter 32 of book 1. I have 36 chapters planned for this story and once it is done I'll be putting it to the side to let it sit and gather some dust before I work on getting it edited and rewritten.

Because this needs a lot of work.

So very much. But it's going to be worth it.

Bk 1: WIP
Bk 2: Planning
Bk 3:
Bk 4
Bk 5
Bk 6
Bk 7 - Final

Title: Untitled Story
Genre: Horror/Paranormal/Supernatural
Pairing styles: M/M
Books in the series (if a series): 2
Status: Writing
Minimum words planned for: 50K
Notes on the story: I'm quite a bit into the first book and I still don't have a good name for it, but that's about normal for me. I have an idea of what it's going to do and I'm still calling it my Mean Bunny story.

Go figure.

Bk 1: WIP
Bk 2: Bellamy's Story - Planning

Title: (Working title) Retail and Supernatural
Genre: Comedy-Horror
Pairing styles: M/M, M/F (not really focused on them though)
Books in the series: 4 planned for, more on the way
Status: Bk 1 WIP
Minimum words planned for: 35K per
Note: This is my brand new baby and I started it for NaNo 2016 but other stories came to be the focus of my month. Such as my Ages bk 1. I have no idea just how long it's going to be but I know just what I want to do with the series and how it will go.

I can tell you right now it starts pretty light hearted, but as the series goes along, things get really dark.

I love it.

Bk 1: Bad Dog - WIP
Bk 2:
Bk 3:
Bk ??
Final Book

Title: Untitled
Genre: Paranormal Romance
Pairing styles: M/M
Books in the series (if a series): 2

Status: WIP

Minimum words planned for: No idea

Notes on the story: This one was dumped on me by the beautiful and lovely Jennifer Amriss while we were chatting in her Facebook fan page. And of course she knows that I have this thing for writing naughty things going on, so she handed it to me.

And then ran away. 

Claiming she didn't need another damn PNR on her plate. So there's that.

It's going to be a Vampire/Half-Angel pairing and despite how much I've talked about the first sex scene, it's not going to turn into an erotica. Why? Because there will be, I'm thinking, one or two actual on-screen sex scenes. And those are kind of needed due to plans and plots.

Now if I could choose which starting scene I'm going with, I would be happy. 

Stories That I'm Not Working on Actively Right Now

Title: "Magical Girl" Series
Genre: Fantasy/
Pairing styles: F/F, M/F
Books in the series (if a series): 2 books
Status: World Building
Minimum Words Planned for: 40K
Notes on the story: Yes, I am still working on this world. It's taking me time because I want to have something of a world going for this.

Bk 1: Planning
Bk 2: Planning

Title: A Magical Taste Series
Genre: Contemporary Fantasy
Pairing styles: Various
Books in the series (if a series): 2 to 10 books
Status: World Building
Minimum Words Planned for: 50K per book
Notes on the story: I still so very much want to do this series but I need to finish off a couple of my other stories before I dive into this rich and diversified world. Because it's going to span all sorts of characters and the such.

I shall have fun.

Bk 1: Forensic/witch
Bk 2: Artist/seer witch

Title: A Family Pack
Genre: Romance/Supernatural
Pairing styles: various
Books in the series (if a series): ??
Statu: World building/plot building
Words minimum planned for: 50K per book
Notes on the story: Actually I need to figure out my notes for this and get is figured out how I want to tackle this series but it's kind of sitting there for the most part since I'm not wanting to do something typical but I still want to do something interesting with this series.

It's just going to take time.

Title: A Twist of Fate series
Genre: action/adventure/survivalist/romance
Pairing styles: various but not the focus
Books in the series (if a series): 2
Status: World building/plot building
Words minimum planned for: 50K
Notes on the story: I had to actually put this to the side. Not because I wanted to but because things go really busy and it's going to take some time in getting around to actually do some research on virus and the such.

But I am working out the plot. Slowly, but surely.

Stand-Alone Stories

Title: Follow Me Down
Genre: Dark Fantasy
Pairing styles: M/M
Books in the series (if a series): just the 1
Status: WIP
Words Minimum planned for: 50K
Notes on the story: Ah, my baby. I do plan on working on this story come 2017, but I'm still not sure what I'm going to do with it.

The history behind how this story came to be kind of messes with me but I love the story line. So it's going to be fun trying to cut that history away from this book.

Title: Black Veiled Saviour
Genre: Mystery
Pairing styles: M/M
Books in the series (if a series): 1
Status: WIP
Minimum Words planned for: 50K
Notes on the story: I'm working on this and I think I know where I'm going with it, so this is going to be fun to write on once more!

I'm so happy to have an idea on how to get things going.

Title: Untitled Prompt Story
Genre: Horror/Paranormal
Pairing styles: nothing truly important
Books in the series (if a series): stand alone
Status: WIP
Minimum Words Planned For: 30K
Notes on the story: Ah, so what to say about this. I'm going to work on this story as I go along because I need to recreate the outline and fill out the story line itself otherwise this is going to drive me up a wall. So I'll be doing that this year.

Fun times.

Title: Untitled
Genre: Paranormal Romance
Pairing styles: M/M
Books in the series (if a series): 1 (for Now)

Status: Planning

Minimum words planned for: Not a clue
Notes on the story: This is a holiday themed one where I wanted to tackle the whole "Santa needs a wife before becoming Santa Troupe". It's actually really interesting and I know who the love interest is, I just have to figure out a few other bits and pieces. Yes, joy. This pounced me near the end of 2016 okay? It was NOT happy making.

Nope. But I'll write it.

What Am I Focusing on in 2017?

I have a couple of lists actually, so how about I give you those lists? 

My lists have changed so often in the last month that I've given up having just several lists and narrowed them down to a few of the stories that I am going to really focus on.

Rewriting/Notes/Ect:
Ages Book 1 (I'm hoping by the time this goes up I'll have the last 3 chapters done)
Lex/Rose
All You Need
A Butterfly's Dream

Focusing on:

Bad Dog
Mean Bunny
Half-Angel/Vampire PNR
"Alive" Zombie story
Honey Drops bk 1
Crimson Shadows
Santa Claus PNR
Follow Me Down
Thread the Needle
Black Veiled Saviour
Untitled Prompt Story

Not that long of a list and it helps me to narrow my thoughts down to what I want to finish. So here's hoping that I get at least a few of these off of my list as 2017 progresses. 

What Is Up With My Stories?

Today's Earworm: "Beautiful Loser" or "Strangers" by William Control
Today's Date: August 8, 2016

What is up with my stories?

To be truthful, my muses are being a bit of a bitch. Excuse the language, but I'm sure that you all can forgive me.

This is kind of normal for me though so I'm not too worried. There was a time where I didn't write a single original piece for like a year, but that was while I was rediscovering myself.

It's just gotten to a point where I need to stop thinking of publishing and just write. No more contemplating the future of publishing and all that I need to know. I will get to that point, I really will. But that time is not right now.

Right now I need to turn my focus to writing and finishing stories.

On that note, I'm creating a new series of short pieces under the Murder and Love banner, with the first 16 piece set called Just a Little Murder. It's a horror mystery with a lot of dark themes and the books to come will be much more descriptive.

As it is, in Short Piece 4 there is some rather callous thinking of forced slavery in the BDSM world, but that is the character.

I keep telling people that my stuff can be dark but do they believe me? Nope. Not until I pull something like this out and show them with all attached warnings. It's highly amusing to see their reactions while they read.

Anyways. I have decided that I need to put aside the thoughts of what I'm going to do with the stories when I finish them and just work on finishing them.

With that said, I've decided to work on When My Eyes Close, which is my 2015 NaNo novel, my zombie fic that was inspired by J.A. Marlow and Honey Drops bk 1. I'm plotting them out and have what I want to happen in them pinpointed.

Mostly.

It's taking me time, yes, but then again, everything takes time to happen, so I'm not to worried really.

I am working on several interesting stories, including a "Magical Girl" kind of world, a Magical Modern world, a dystopia that is based off of my story that I handed over to Forward Motion writers for publishing, and a few others, so no worries about that. Actually, you can see the full list of things that I have in the works here.

I'll try and create a newer list here by September, so we'll see how things go with that.

As it is, tomorrow I'm going to be heading over to my friend's place after some last minute shopping for foods so we can go see "Suicide Squad" in theaters. We're picking up some chips, dips, and adult beverages. My local Albertsons has a "Build your own 6 pack" set up for like 10 bucks? Little less than that. And considering there is Smirnoff, various Mike's products, ales, beers and other goodies? Worth it.

Are we going to drink our six packs? No. I'll probably drink one or two and bring the rest home to indulge in over the next few months. I'm odd like that. I rarely drink but when I do I do it sparingly.

Yes, I'm over 21. So yes, I'm legal. More than. Thank you.

But we're going to need something to relax with on the 11th because we're going to be out ALL day on the 10th. Fun times. Really.

Anyways, I hope to see you here next week! Keep an eye out on Fridays for when I start posting my short pieces. :D

Let's Talk...Abandoning a Story and Updates

Today's Earworm: The Way of Your World by Destrophy
Today's Date: May 30, 2016

Okay, so sit back and close your eyes. Imagine you're reading a story (on Fictionpress.net, or WattPad, or any service like that and you come to the last two chapters.

But wait! They're not chapters! They're an Author's Note that is telling you they're ditching the story or stories for whatever reason. Usually it's something stupid like "I don't get enough reviews/likes/kudos/whatever to post more on this so fuck all of my readers who really enjoy this story".

Or they're not even an Author's Note, they're actual chapters but the story hasn't been updated in years, so you go to the profile page of the person. And they state that they aren't doing their stories any more for a bad reason*.

*Bad reasons are those reasons that you have to stare at and go "What? What kind of bull is this?" This does NOT include reasons that include mental problems, emotional problems, computer problems, or reasonable real life excuses.

Now this really pushes my buttons (and the fact that I had to edit this several times to make it less ranty and more actually informative is telling you something I hope) and I seem to keep running across it.

Both in the world of fanfiction and site based originals. In regards to site based originals, I am talking about such sites like WattPad, Adult-Fanfiction, Archive of Our Own, and Fictionpress.net. Yes, AFF.org and AO3 both do have original sections but you have to kind of dig around for the better things.

I can and do understand life getting in the way. I've had stuff make it so that I wasn't posting, much less writing, for months at a time. So thank you to those who have updated us about their lives and where things are going for you , and I hope life balances out and doesn't kill the muse on you completely.

But I can't understand people not trying to find a balance in their life with their writing.

Okay, look. This is kind of an interesting subject because I had to work on finding a balance with my own writing and life when I was younger.

I have to say this again though: I can and do understand that life can get in the way or your writing and this is directed to those whose life is kind of not writing allowable currently. This is directed to those who say that they want to write, but don't do anything to figure out a schedule or work ethic.

I keep finding those who go "I want to be published/publish" but for some reason ditch a story (even if it is just fanfiction or an original on a site) because they're not getting any reviews/kudos/what have you.

I'm going to impart a bit of truth: Unless you are an established writer who has a good sized fanbase who feels they can trust you in getting your stories out and written and looking good, you won't be getting many reviews. Or pimping. Or anything like that.

Allow me to break it down into simple terms. For those who self-publish, they work their asses off to get any kind of reviews for their books, much less any "You should read this book!" reviews. Most traditionally published writers work just as hard depending on their popularity at the time and the company that is publishing them. They tend to still talk about their own stuff on their own blogs, web sites, and social media accounts.

If you have problems with the fact that most readers on a free to read site doesn't review or kudo, then you're going to have many more problems with the fact that your books won't have that many reviews. At least not until you start creating a fan base that trusts you in putting out a good book.

And in this world, holding a book hostage for reviews is career suicide. It's career suicide to hold a chapter to an online story as it is anyways. People are getting kind of tired of that and tend to pick up and move on.

Yes, I do have some stories that aren't done, but that's because I have decided that I need to sit down and tear them into bitty pieces to rewrite them, if not just turn into some new books.

No, I am not abandoning them.

Yes, they will be done.

No, I do not know when the stories will be done.

No, I do not know if I will replace the posted chapters on my sites with the new stories.

I'm not that far along in this process after all. But that doesn't mean that I've abandoned my stories, okay? I'm working on them, and I won't abandon them. The same goes with my fanfiction. I have to much fun with it to give it up ever.

And I don't know if I want to turn my Butterfly Series into something publishable.

Now, onto something a bit happier, as a general update on things, I am preparing for National Novel Writing Month (November 2016) and the next Camp National Novel Writing Month (July 2016), so we're going to see where I'm at when it comes time.

I'm hoping to finish Bk 1 of Through the Ages series, which is my hero series. That will allow me time to set it aside for a couple of months before I start the massive rewriting overhaul of the story itself. I'm also going to work on a couple of other fictions that I need to get done and start a couple of others, including my submission to Forward Motions 2016 Anthology.

I need to rethink my plot for that as it is. I have a few ideas but I need to rethink it.

So I'm busy as always, melting from the heat, and editing videos for my vlog and for the youtube channel that I am a part of with my friend. Need to get the intro video done though if it keeps giving me trouble I'm going to say screw it and rerecord it when I can.

As for the NaNo story that I'm going to do this year, I'm working on a fanfiction idea that is driving me up a wall so I'm going to write it. I have around 11 chapters planned out already. Here's hoping I have the rest ready to go.

Anyways, I have a lot to do today and very little time to do it.

So for now, I shall leave you with this and go about trying to find a story that is complete, long, and not abandoned. Wish me luck!

Writers Meme Tag Questions 2

Today's Earworm: Whore by In This Moment
Today's Date: May 23, 2016

And we come to the other half of the asks that I started last week. Remember you can find the list of all 50 questions on Maxkrin's Tumblr Blog along with all sorts of goodies that will help any writer.

Writers Meme Tag Questions 1


26: Which do you enjoy reading the most: physical, ebook, or both?

Physical or Ebook. Now that's kind of a tough one to answer. I like both really depending on what I'm doing. If I'm going for a long trip, I don't want to carry physical books so I'll make sure I have my chargers and bring my tablet to read my books on. But if I'm in bed, I like a real book in my hands.

I have a thing for the smell of paper and ink okay? I'm a writer. It's my kink.

27: Which is your favorite genre to write?

My favorite genre has to be Horror. Especially psychological horror. It's just so much fun to take something innocent or simple and twist it and make others wonder and fear.

28: Which do you find hardest: the beginning, the middle, or the end?

I have to say that the middle is probably the hardest part for me. When it comes to the start, I tend to know where I want to start and how I want to start by the time I want to write, and the end usually writes itself, so to speak. But filling in that point B in the A-B-C of my books tends to be a bitch.

29: Which do you find easiest: writing or editing?

Writing is actually easier for me than editing. Why? It's mostly because I don't want to sit there and read my own writing over, and over, and over again. It's kind of hard to do that, but I push through it. I usually rewrite while I write though so I can smooth a few of my issues out before I edit so that is making things easier.

30: Have you ever written fan-fiction?

Yes, I have and yes I still do. If you want to find me, I'm willing to tell you where to find me but since I would like to keep that part separate from my original writing career, it will be via e-mails or private messaging on one of my man sties. Sorry you guys.

31: Have you ever been published?

Not yet, but I am working on getting there.

32: How do you feel about friends and close relatives reading your work?

It depends on the person and the story. Most of my relatives won't understand why I write male/male pairings much less horror so I don't share it with them. But I do share most of my writing works with close friends who I know will enjoy writing them.

33: Are you interested in having your work published?

Yes, and I'll probably end up doing indie publishing when I get that point in my career. Just takes time.

34: Describe your writing space.

My writing space is actually in my bedroom. It's pretty much just a desk that I bought from Amazon and a rather comfortable chair (now that I got a memory foam sitting pillow). My laptop sits on a lap fan with mouse and keyboard (wired both) attached to it but resting on a keyboard drawer, so that works for me.

My desk is kind of covered in stuff (tissue box, bunny, some candles, wax burner, lip balms, necklace, some rubbing alcohol, suntan lotion, aloe gel, and body lotion). The shelves are covered in notebooks and files.

35: What’s your favorite time of day for writing?

My favorite time for writing has to be around sunset when the world starts to cool down. I don't do well in the heat and unfortunately, I don't do much writing while hot. Which sucks.

36: Do you listen to music when you write?

I do listen to music. It all depends on what I'm writing that will depend on what I listen to.

37: What’s your oldest WIP?

My oldest WIP has to be the Butterfly series, but I'm going to work on creating two different stories in that world. I'm going to focus the Butterfly series as a world on it's own while I work on creating Rye and his husbands as their own world connected with my friend's world.

I just need to get her for like 10 seconds and tell her what I'm thinking of doing.

38: What’s your current WIP?

I have several current WIPs. I have my "Zombie with a brain" story, Follow Me Down, Crimson Drops, Thread the Needle, Black Veiled Saviour, Honey Drops bk 1, a prompt based horror short, and my Lex/Rose story. There's a few that I had to forcibly put down because they'll be shorter series, but I seriously don't want to start those just yet.

39: What’s the weirdest story idea you’ve ever had?

The plot idea for Honey Drops because of the fact that it mixes Mythological creatures with aliens.

40: Which is your favorite original character, and why?

My favorite original has to be Rye. He's just such a broken little mess with so much power that he's not sure on what to do with it. He has two hubbies (for the moment), a Goddess watching his every move, and Fate trying to string him up by his nuts. Not only that he's stalked by a demon he fucked for power, and he's impossible to kill at the moment.

Though people have  tried to kill him. Once by burning him at the stake. It wasn't pretty.

He's just a such a lovely little thing.

41: What do you do when characters don’t follow the outline?

I adjust the outline if I feel that it's where the story should go to. There is a good reason why I rarely have more than 10 chapters planned out for any one book. And if I do have more than 10 chapters planned, it's because I know what needs to be done. But the outline is always changing as I write.

42: Do you enjoy making your characters suffer?

Yes. Why do you ask?

Okay, look, I'm a horror writer. I have to enjoy making my characters suffer or the story never goes anywhere and it doesn't read right. If I wasn't a sadistic bitch to my characters the story would fall flat okay?

I'm a nice person to those in the real life.

43: Have you ever killed a main character?

Why yes, I have. Clary was a main character in my Butterfly series and he was killed to help the plot move along. I got some heavy cries of "NOOO" from my readers at the time.

44: What’s the weirdest character concept you’ve ever come up with?

Weirdest character concept? Not really should he's weird but an old blood demon (original vampiric beings which spawned the vampires) that I used to RP with. He was then reformed into one of my brothers for Honey Drops.

45: What’s your favorite character name?

It has to be Alexx because it's such a lovely name. And very flexible. I have a few styles of this character for various worlds and places.

46: Describe your perfect writing space.

My perfect writing space is where I have privacy, sunlight that I'm not directly under, with a comfortable seat and a lovely desk to sit at with access to a TV, VCR, DVD player, computers, music systems, water kettle, coffee pot, and a good supply of both tea and coffee with all needed additives.

I pretty much have that now.

47: If you could steal one character from another author and make then yours, who would it be and why?

One character from another author to make mine? Hmm, not sure actually. It would probably be Son'arrin from my friend who writes "A Demon's Toy" (online story that is going through some MASSIVE amounts of rewriting) but I doubt that I could do him full justice.

He's a broken character just like Rye.

48: If you could write the next book of any series, which one would it be, and what would you make the book about?

Harry Potter. I would love to do a book in the Harry Potter series and write it from Neville Longbottom's POV or from Hermione Granger's POV. Work my way through all 7 books and see how things went through their eyes. They were such interesting characters.

Or even characters like Dean Thomas or Seamus (I forget his last name). It's such a big world that there would be so much to explore even sticking to the canon of the story.

49: If you could write a collaboration with another author, who would it be and what would you write about?

A collaboration with another author would have to be with Jennifer Amriss. She is a wonderful writer and a friend that I made a while ago. So I would love to work with her on a collaboration.

Or I would love to write with Necia Phoenix. She to is a wonderful writer and I would love to see what we could come up with if we sat down and worked out some interesting story lines.

Yes, writers who are indy are the ones that I'm after for collaborations if that ever happens. But I love their writing and their style. It's just so much fun.

50: If you could live in any fictional world, which would it be?

I don't think I would ever live in any fictional world because they all have their problems and I'd rather not run into that.

Writers Meme Tag Questions 1

Today's Ear Worm:
Today's Date: May 16, 2016

First and foremost, go over to this here Link, and read my interview done by the every lovely Connie! It's my first one and I kind of had fun doing it.

But I decided to do a couple of writer tags but just do them on here since I can't do a video properly right now due to my throat.

So this is part one and the list of questions if you wish to do it yourself is here on Maxkrin's Tumblr Blog.


01: When did you first start writing?

When did I first start writing? Gods years and years and years ago. I was about 12 years of age actually when I started scribbling silly little poems before moving onto fanfiction that will never see the light of day right around 15.

02: What was your favorite book growing up?

I didn't really have a favorite book until I was like 14. And then it was Anne Rice's "Interview with a Vampire" which expanded to a few of her other books.

03: Are you an avid reader?

Yes, I am. I read quite a bit actually.

04: Have you ever thrown a book across the room?

No. No, wait yes, once. When I tried to read "50 Shades of Grey". I threw it hard enough to break the spine.

I. Do. Not. Regret. It. One. Tiny. Bit.

05: Did you take writing courses in school/college?

Outside of the basic English courses, no I didn't. I find that if I try to take a course on writing it tends to mess with my writing and I don't learn anything at all because I'm sitting there going "this is to stiff". It's kind of counter-productive.

06: Have you read any writing-advice books?

Again, they tend to be counter-productive for me, but I have read a few when I was first starting to write and looking to become better. One thing that I've taken from them is all "practice is a good thing" and "editing is your friend". So pretty much what I knew.

07: Have you ever been part of a critique group?

No because the last time someone asked for a crit, I was rather blunt that read as harsh since the bit that I was reading didn't look like she had tried to edit it much less make it look like a story.

08: What’s the best piece of feedback you’ve ever gotten?

Not a lot actually since I rarely share my stories, but the best bit I could have gotten was from a wonderful friend who told me to try psychological horror. I have and have learned that I love writing in that.

09: What’s the worst piece of feedback you’ve ever gotten?

"You suck. Your story sucks. Your characters suck." That's it. Yeah. Not the least bit helpful.

10: What’s your biggest writer pet-peeve?

Dialogue tags and punctuation! I swear people seem to not know how to write dialogue tags with proper punctuations. Let's not go into that yes? It's not that hard to understand. *sighs*

And "Damsel in distress with more than one guy after her". Just...overkilled lately.

11: What’s your favorite book cover?
Mmm, not sure actually. But it has to be J.A. Marlow's series book covers.

12: Who is your favorite author?

I don't really have a favorite author actually. Surprisingly enough I really don't. 

13: What’s your favorite writing quote?
Frank Miller's quote about a noir hero. It's a good thing to have in mind when writing it.

"The noir hero is a knight in blood caked armor. He's dirty and he does his best to deny the fact that he's a hero the whole time."

14: What’s your favorite writing blog? c;

No real favorites again. I watch and read so many that I don't have a solid favorite for various reasons.

15: What would you say has inspired you the most?

My mother. She's been here from day one and encouraged me to find a new story in everything that I do. Which is what I'm inspired by. Just living my life and moving through things.

16: How do you feel about movies based on books?

They would be well done I think but I think that it would need to be watched by the writer if they're alive, or someone who knows the books well enough to make sure that the important things get into the movies.

17: Would you like your books to be turned into TV shows, movies, video games, or none?
I wouldn't mind any of them actually. But my books would probably be better to be movies more than TV shows and video games. Except my Magical Girl series actually. That would make a good TV show if done right.

18: How do you feel about love triangles?
Love triangles actually kind of annoy me to a point. Unless it's very well done, I tend to stay away from them when it comes to reading or writing them.

19: Do you prefer writing on a computer or longhand?
A mix actually. It depends on the story and what I'm doing during that month. During April and July (Camp National Novel Writing Months), I tend to write on my computer with very little longhand, and during November (National Novel Writing Month) I write exclusively on my laptop.

20: What’s your favorite writing program?

My favorite writing program is actually just Gdocs and OpenOffice Writer. I don't have the money for anything else really so I'm happy with what I have.

21: Do you outline?

Yes, yes I do, mostly because if I don't I'm not going to get far.

22: Do you start with characters or plot?

Mix actually. I'll start with a few characters and work the plot out that comes with them.

23: What’s your favorite & least favorite part of making characters?

Creating personalities, figuring out looks, and sexuality. All of that is just such a pain in my ass but I do it. 

24: What’s your favorite & least favorite part of plotting?

My favorite part of plotting is creating it. My least favorite is sitting down and fleshing it out. It's a pain but it must happen.

25: What advice would you give to young writers?

Research is your best friend. That old adage "Write what you know" doesn't have to mean "don't fucking well learn nothing in the course of your damn life". You have books. The internet. Use it! Learn things. It'll come in handy with your writing and with your life to. 

Come back next week for the second half of the questions!

Peeking Into My Mind

Today's Ear Worm: Highwayman by Beseech
Today's Date: May 9, 2016

Forwarning: This is going to be slightly rambly because there has been a lot that has gone on in the last 9 plus days. But this is what I'm going through and what I'm thinking and what I'm planning so buckle in and read each section's title.

My Friend Tonya

The last couple of months have been extraordinarily busy for my friend. She has, like me, chronic pain, but unlike me she has found a good chronic pain specialist who has been sending her to get various tests done. Which is good for her.

But makes life a tad busy for all of us since some of those tests are to see how she reacts to epidurals steroid shots. What happens is she's put under so that they can take long ass needles and stick them on either side of her spine.

She did the last one of her spine shots on May 2nd and I was babysitting a mutt while exhausted and doing a younow stream. I'll talk about the stream later in this post, promise. But she has a few other shots to go yet and those will be happening on the 9th and later on the 26th of this month. 

She also lost her mother on Wednesday but we have been prepared for this for a long time. 7 Years and about 5 different types of cancer in those years will do that to someone who is having to watch. We knew that she wouldn't have long since the doctors couldn't unfortunately do a whole lot since through all of the other cancer's she became allergic to the chemotherapy and it was such an aggressive cancer this time.

She lasted a month at home with hospice care, dying with her husband by her side, holding her hand.

Tonya spent yesterday smoking her cigarettes and having an adult smoothie. Fruits, vanilla smirnoff vodka, and some juice okay? Adult smoothie.

So my friend isn't bad, but still it's been a stressful time for all of us since we do have to go with her to the appointments due to the fact that she is knocked out for the shots.

Camp National Novel Writing Month

Yep, that's right, I won April's round of Camp! I'm rather proud of myself really since it was such a fight to get the words out and down. I got about four chapters into Book 0 of the Don't Look series, the book called Thread the Needle. I have to work out what I want to continue to work on with it before I do anything with it thought so that's going to take time.

I did get some one-shots, gift fictions and a few other things done which was nice. 

But still it was so hard to get the words down, but I did get them.

Personal Life

My personal life is just kind of eh right now. I'm having to say no to people just to keep my sanity and of course jury duty decided to pop up. *rolls eyes* So now I'm having to go "I can't do jury duty because of this reason" and having to call them and all that good shit. I'm sighing and stressing. 

Not good for my health. 

Writing

My writing is actually going okayish. I'm getting words, which is nice, but I spent most of last week rewriting with very little actual writing because I was just so busy with everything else. 

I am focusing on Thread the Needle, figuring out what I want to do with it and how to go about doing it. I have the family and their names, have hinted at how the world is built (because it's historical but it's not at the same time), and have been thinking about how to mess around with that world.

I'm about 17 chapters through my first book of my superhero series, called Ages, and still have something like 19 more chapters to write before I put it to the side to sit and contemplate the second story for the series. It's now up to about 8 books in the series, but it's going to be interesting to write in the long run. 

I'm also working on book 1 of my Crimson series that is pretty much the rewritten version of my NaNo book from 2010 or there about. That's making me happy.

I'm also doing the next anthology for Forward Motion (2016 one, 2015 shall be out soon!) with the prompt "Open Roads". I need to write that so I can have time to rewrite and edit it actually. I'm planning on doing that sometime this month.

Younow Streaming

Yes! I stream on Younow.com. I'm called SunnyLewis on there and I've only done 1 or 2 so far. I'm trying to figure out the best way to get things going so we'll see how things do in the following months. I have decided that I will be doing a stream every week as long as I'm up to it, but I just need to figure out the best time to do so seeing as I live in Arizona and we have our own time zone. 

Can you see the rolling eyes? Yes? Good.

I'm thinking Sunday's around noon or 1PM will be best so we'll test that out for the next few months.

My Twitter account has the announcements of me online, along with my tumblr and facebook! So keep an eye out on that. :D

Well, that turned out less rambely then I thought it would be. Huh.

Anyways, if you have any topic that you would like to see come around, feel free to comment and suggest!

Also, on Connie's Random Thoughts on May 11th, she will be posting the interview with me! My first interview! Woot! I hope you guys enjoy and read it. :D

Let's Talk...The Truth of Being a Writer and Author

Today's Earworm: Clint Eastwood by Gorillaz
Today's Date: February 2, 2016

Please note that this is geared towards Independent Publishing Writers, or indie pub writers.

A couple of weeks ago, a writer friend named Connie Cockrell wrote a guest post for a blog called Coolerbs Writes where she talks about being a writer.

And it got me to thinking.

What is a writer? Well, each writer and published author has several hats which they have to don at times.

We have to be Editor. We have to edit and rewrite and edit again before sending it to another person to go over. Then we have to edit and rewrite and edit again before it can be sent to yet another person. Maybe put through a serious like ProWritingAid, which is a great way to find inconsistency, repeating phrases, and other such things in a timely fashion.

We have to be Publicist. We have to tell people that we're putting out another book. We have to put out ad's and information on where you can find it, and when you can buy it. We have to do it all without someone shopping our book around for us.

We have to be Agent. We have to make our connections and use them ourselves, getting our name out there and around.We're the ones who have to read the contracts and work out the deals and know all sorts of laws.

We have to be Publishing Company. We're the ones who are publishing our things. We have to set up the files and make sure all the code is ready and will transfer properly. We have to make sure that each book is up and selling properly. That it transferred properly. That it looks good.

We have to be a One Man Company. That means that we have to do all the work that a traditional publishing company does, and then some. We have to not only push our books and get noticed and all that, we have to keep track of our incoming and outgoing money, our taxes, and all sorts of laws that would make our lives that much more complicated.

And we all have to do this without other people to do much more than to tell us where we should look and what things should be looked into.

We're not just sitting there and pounding out a novel in a couple of months, doing some quick editing, some quick coding, and putting it out there pull in the money. It's not that though. Guys, we work so hard to get these books written and polished up good enough to be put out there, and allowed to get things done.

And it's not just all that we have to worry about. We have to worry about money that is coming in and money that is going out, taxes, and laws, and so much more.

Every.

Single.

Day.

It's about long days and balancing our lives outside of writing with our lives of writing. It's all about learning and continuing with living and learning some more.

A writers life isn't all that glamorous, but if it's meant for you, you find happiness in your life.

But that's for a publishing writer's life.

And that's your choice if you want to do it all.

Hugs and kisses all!

Now! Before I end this, and technically this post is done with, I have a question, and I know someone is reading my stuff, so I need some answers if you guys wouldn't mind.

Would you want to see some Flash Fiction from me? I'm talking short bits around 200 to 500 words in length, self contained mini stories pretty much.

I don't know if they would become a weekly think or if they would just be something to enjoy every so often on Monday's posts.

But I want to know!

So tell me below, or tell me on my tumblr, twitter, or facebook, all of which can be followed via the links. Thank you for your time!

Let's Talk...Chronic Pain and Depression

Today's Ear Worm: Hmm, no idea. How about Little Talks by Monsters and Men
It works for me.

Date: February 10, 2016

So I'm not sure how to really start this blog. It's going to get a little...personal? I guess you can say that yes, it's going to be a bit personal.

Mostly because this blog is about how I've been doing and what I've been doing and all that good stuff.

I'm not really sure as how to talk about this without sounding like I'm whining, cause I'm not! Really, I'm not. But things are a bit much for me and I really don't have anywhere else to talk about this. So since it does impact my writing, I decided to start a series called "Let's Talk".

This series will be about how a writers writing can be impacted by various things in their life. Today's topic? Chronic pain and Depression.

First of all, what is Chronic Pain? And what is Depression?

Well, first of all Chronic Pain is defined as any pain that lasts more than 12 weeks at a time. It is not acute pain, which is just the sensation of pain that alerts us to possible injury or strain. Chronic Pain doesn't really have much of a cause and persists.

I've been living with fully body Chronic Pain for the last, let's see, 8 years? Since about 2008. I did something to my back in 2007 and it's all been downhill from there. Yes, I am losing weight but it's never been the cause of it, so let's shut that down first and foremost yes? I used to be a twig with hips (as my friends often called me) up until I turned 14 when puberty smacked me up side the head with a 2 by 4.

I still had pain but not as bad as this.

I probably have done a lot to my body but a lot comes from genetics. I can readily admit that I've gone headfirst over the handle bars of my bikes when I was younger and been in a couple of accidents but all those did was aggravate the pain that I had already been experiencing.

Depression is defined as an illness that involves your body, mood, and your thoughts. It affects the way someone eats, sleeps, feels about themselves and the way they think about things.

I can not say this enough but, DEPRESSION IS NOT A PASSING PHASE. It does not go away just because a person is told to pull themselves together! It is a long term, sometimes lifelong, battle with yourself.

Treatment can help people find their balance, find their peace and rise above the depression, but it does take time and the right treatment for them to get there.

So if you do not have depression, don't think you know how someone who does have it feels. You don't. It's...not easy trying to fight the demons that depression brings.

And it's not just a mental fight, it's a physical one to. It can literally cause the person physical pain.

Which is not good for me. I know when I'm in a depression. My pain gets worse.

Now that I've said that, let's get down to how it affects my writing shall we?

When I'm in pain or depressed, it's very hard to get the words down onto paper. It's not like I can always ignore the pain or ignore the little voice of self-doubt in the back of my head to get those words down all the time. It's not that easy. Not really. It's rather hard actually.

So I've been trying to write while in a serious amount of pain. My back and shoulders hurt mostly right now so it makes it hard to sit at the computer since I don't have a good desk and chair yet. I'm saving up to get some, which is sometime next month. I'll have to deal with it and set things up but it'll be better.

For now though, I'm dealing with the writing. But it takes me time to write. This means that I'm behind on a lot of things, including setting up these blog posts. So it's going to be fun for the next couple of weeks.

Here's hoping that things get easier yes?

2016 is my time to Write and Live!

This is actually a post on another site but I thought it would work best here to. There are some edits to it to flesh out the information and get it out.

Ear Worm: Unknown Man "E": The Most Mysterious Mummy in the World Documentary

Okay, I think that it's time for this writer to get going on some of the things that have been sitting around and mocking me.

More than time actually.

It's 11 days into 2016 and already I've been triggered into a near panic attack 3+ times, written very little due to said panic attacks, and want to drop the whole world down a hole while I get some actual sleep.

So what do I do? I go for a walk, Slipknot's "Snuff" in my ears and the cold buffering at me so I can clear my head and think of what I really truly want in my life this year.

Time to break it down into easy to bite pieces so I can learn a new routine. Which will help my mental and physical state.

January:
1) Plot out a few more chapters of Honey Drops series book 1
2) Maybe actually give it a working title?

3) Plot out a few more chapters of A Delicate Thread (Don't Look Series book 1)
4) Write out at least 2 chapters of both Honey Drops series book 1 and A Delicate Thread

5) Plot out some more chapters of the book that I started of Nano 2015. Let's call the mean little bugger Mean Bunny or When My Eyes Close.
6) Figure out Bellamy (from Mean bunny) and what his story in the book will be.
7) Write out at least 2 chapters of Mean Bunny

8) Create book bibles for Don't Look series and Honey Drops series

9) Buy more composition notebooks for other book bibles.

Feb
1) Repeat without 8 and 9

March
1) Repeat without 8 and 9

April

1) Repeat without 8 and 9

2) Do Camp National Novel Writing Month Round 1 (might work on When My Eyes Close)

July

1) Do Camp National Novel Writing Month Round 2

Sometime in the next 6 months:

1) Talk with friend about shared world (Her series A Demon's Toy and my series A Butterfly's Life) and get some kind of headway into that full on rewrite.

2) Plot out a bit more/write more on A Butterfly's Dance.

3) Plot out a world I'm currently calling Magical Girls.

Please see below at the very bottom about the stories that are mentioned here.
 

That's about all I'm willing to plot out for this year so far, but I'll probably add more as I go along.

For my personal life...I just have a general list. And I'm sure you've seen some of these in my post New Years Resolutions of a Creative Mind

1) Go back to therapy for the depression and see if I can't find something to help me when I have panic attacks.
2) Get rid of the toxic people in my life.
3) Ignore the idiots. They cause me stress. I have enough stress.
4) Put in SSI paperwork (I'm unable to work due to a variety of reasons)
5) Go in to the doc to find another type of pain killer that will help me control the chronic pain and won't cause more problems.
6) Get new asthma rescue inhaler since the ones that I had I have a 50/50 chance of having a reaction to. Which send me into panic attacks. Which is just a nasty cycle.
7) Get a desk.
8) Get a new chair.
9) Recreate my safe space. I need to do this for my health and sanity
10) Clean my safe space. *nudges aside notebooks*

Let's just hope that I can do this yes?

I have word goals of about 5k a week, if not more, and editing and/or rewriting once a week.

Let's see how this goes.

*rolls up sleeves* *pulls on comfy clothes* *gets to it* Charge!

Honey Drops series: This series is a kind of fantasy sci-fi with elements of romance. It's slated to sprawl over about 6 books, 3 of those books about brothers, two about family connected people, and the last one is to wrap things up. I have a 7th but that's going to be all the side bits that didn't make it into the actual books but help fill in details. 

That book shall come out around the second book when I get around to putting them out. 

When My Eyes Close: This one is just horror and death. I grew up on a killer killing off the stupid people kind of movies. I wanted to see if I can translate this into a book. It's going well so far. 

Magical Girls: This one actually started out as a Sailor Moon Prompt fic for a friend (she love's sailor moon just as much as I do), but it kind of took on it's own life. 

I'm currently thinking out the plot, how to change things around, and characters. It'll be fun, to say the least. 

Don't Look: Another series that started out as something else and turned into a full on story line. I have 3 books thought of with the possibility of more. I hope to get things going on this one but it does take time. Here's hoping.

A Butterfly's Life: Dream is book 2 of the series but I'm working on book 1 right now so I can figure out where I'm going with this story. It'll be interesting, to say the least. *sighs* *headdesk* We'll have to see how it goes. 

I just might take the plot and create a new world based off of it while keeping this story line as an online thing. 

We'll see how it goes in the long run. Cross your fingers. 

New Years Resolutions of a Creative Mind

Theme Song: Song of the North by BrunuhVille
Today's Date: January 4, 2016

As I sit here and think about the world as it is and all that is going on, I find that I have to remind myself to just...stop.

Stop and look at myself.

Stop and think about myself for once.

Stop and put myself first before others when it comes to my life.

I think that, 4 days into the New Year, that I am doing pretty darn good all things considered.

But I'll be figuring more out as I go along to. I'm still young even though I'm in my early 30's. I have time to really figure out who I am without worrying about others for once.

Because I am S.L. Lewis. And I'm an writer.

And I like that.

But I'm not really here to talk about that now am I?

No, I'm here to talk about what I'm going to do one way or the other this year.

My New Years Resolutions.

Let's go over them shall we?

1. Find my mental stability stability again.
2. Remove the toxicity in my life and get past it.
3. Finish at least one rough draft.
4. Write at minimum 5,000 words a week.
5. Get at least 260k words for the entire year.
6. Get in some much needed paperwork.
7. Do at least one blog journal a week about various things. 

Okay so I have a list, but what does this all mean?

1) Find my mental stability stability again.

Unfortunately for me, 2015 was not kind to me. I've fought depression for many, many years, since back in...Gah, about 1998 actually. This year was just not happy with me so I need to head back to Therapy again. 

And find a place that doesn't have people who I want to vent about following my every move. Disparaging everything that I say. 

I might actually start another tumblr blog with that in mind. We'll have to see how things go in the long run. 

2) Remove the toxicity in my life and get past it.

This is connected to Goal one actually. I can't get rid of some of it right away due to the fact that I need the person (as much as I hate to say it) but I can limit contact and the amount of time that I actually spend with them. 

But there is other toxicity that I can remove. 

And I shall.

3) Finish at least one rough draft.

I actually just found a wonderful site and I'll be talking about them more later on this year, but it's because of the wonderful Jennifer Amriss that I found this site just as I restarted my love affair with a good romance book.

So I'm trying my hand at romances again, but I need to finish off a few stories first though. I'm actually thinking of working on Book 1 of my Honey Drops series. Here's hoping that I get that going yes? *crosses fingers* 

4) Write at minimum 5,000 words a week.

I do this every year. It's a thing that I like doing. I did hit the goal, mostly, for 2015, but I'm hoping to keep it going this year.

5) Get at least 260k words for the entire year.

This ties in with number 4. I got well over 260K in 2015, but I'm going to keep going for as many words as I can this year. I'm actually hoping to reach closer to 300k. Who's with me in doing this?

6) Get in some much needed paperwork.

Personal goal since I can't physically work. Which sucks but eh, it happens. Between my body not liking me and my mind screwing me over in every which way, I need to get this stuff in.

But, nice thing, my insurance has labeled my asthma as a chronic illness. Hurrah.

7) Do at least one blog journal a week about various things. 

This one will be fun and MOSTLY easy since I can sit there and work things out as I go along. Set up scheduled posts and the such. Edit said posts before they come out.

Doing my thing on various series. 

Which reminds me, I need to get things ready for my first series.

Either way, everyone, THANK YOU. For everything. It's nice to know that I have friends who are willing to help. Thank you all. Seriously.

An Update on a Tired Writer

December 11, 2015 (Just after Midnight here actually)
Today's Soundtrack: Mariah Carey "Obsessed"

So what has this writer been up to so close to the start of the New Year?

I've been busy, is what's been going on. If you watch my Facebook or watch my Youtube, you know that I've been busy at work putting up Christmas decorations and the such. It's hard work putting them up since I haven't been feeling very good lately.

Seriously just run down and exhausted. So tired at the moment. All I want to do is curl up and ignore the world as it is. Just so damn tired.

But I have to push through this. I'm actually able to just stop and relax finally. I still have things to do but not as much as I did.

Okay, so let me break down the last 10 days for you guys.

Dec 1: I went with my friend to Wal-Mart. She does her banking there since it's local and it's right there in the store, so we pulled the needed money and broke up what we had to. She had people to pay back, bills to pay and stuff to buy. We spent the next hour picking up things that both her and I needed. I got the last of my mother's presents and bought my friend some things. Which was fun.

Dec 2: Went food shopping with my other friend. Her money comes in on the first, food stamps the 2nd. We hit Sam's Club first and seeing as it's snow bird season (and if you don't know what that is, you don't live in no-snow country), so it was busy and packed. Tweaked me enough to send me into a slight panic attack.

Dec 3: Decorating.

Dec 4: First day of Physical therapy for my shoulder. It wasn't all that fun okay? I was sore.

Dec 5: More decorating.

Dec 6: Food shopping for my household. Funs.

Dec 7: I would have had PT but they didn't have any openings so I went with a friend across the Cali border to do some shopping. Giant hams, nearly three hours on the road, and no tablet to read things on. I was exhausted.

Dec 8: And yet more decorating, cleaning and trying to just SIT for ten seconds. Didn't happen and I took pain killers.

Dec 9: Yep, that's right. PT. They added two more exercises onto what I was already doing. And I was still drugged from the night before. I came home and proceeded to have the worst panic attack that I've ever had in the last two years. I called my friend and someone who has become a touchstone long ago.

She helped me calm down. Along with the cup of Sleepy Time Vanilla. I was sore, shakey and on uneven ground after it. But I got past it.

I also got a hug from a wonderful friend who also shared her chocolate with me. The chocolate was gone in the hour after she left but the hug helped me focus.

Dec 10: FINALLY I got to just stop. I spent most of the day writing actually and plotting.

So what's on today's schedule?

Well, I'm going to PT today, later in the afternoon. But beyond that I'm pretty much just going to relax and enjoy myself. And talk with friends on Forward Motion chat because they give me such lovely ideas.

Now, what am I working on writing wise?

Well, outside of When My Eyes Close (Nano 2015), I'm working on Book 1 of The Honey Drops Series, which I'm tentatively calling Just a Little Taste. I have about 6 books planned out for this series, plus a 7th book to hold any side stories that don't fit into the books themselves. So far, I have one story that's set around book 3 or so.

When My Eyes Close is actually book 1 in a duology. Bellamy, one of my main characters, decided he wanted his own book so I'm going to follow that line and do so. Just need to plan that out.

It'll be fun. I hope.

I pray.

I've also been fuddling around with Follow Me Down, which is a fantasy something that I'm not sure as to what I want to do with it. But it'll be fun. I hope.

So that's what I've been up to. I'm going to go game some more and then crash out.

Merry Christmas.
Happy Yule.
Happy Holidays.
Whatever.

May the world shine bright this holiday season for you.

Nano Day 6 - November 6, 2015

Day 6
November 6, 2015
Today's theme: "The Bund" by The Shanghai Restoration Project

Hello all! I am here to share what I have been up to today. Which was quite a lot but some of it is extremely personal so I'm not going to get into that today.

What I am going to get into is where my writing stands as of now. Quick widget:

This is pretty much telling me that in 6 days I have made 21 percent of my 50K word count goal. And that's really rather good for me. :D I'm proud of myself. :D

Especially since Wednesday was just such a flop. That's where getting in some sexual bits come in handy since I tend to write them rather long.

I went shopping and got home around 3:30. Put things away and sat down, staring at my computer for a good hour and a half after I got home. Again, part of those personal bits, but still.

I decided to work on a fanfiction since my mind is rather on the mean side. I now have plans on stringing a guy up by his bits and then having one of my characters preserving them. Yes, it's not a good day to day, thus the warning at the top.

But I did want to share that I am getting words done (hurrah!) and I'm getting things done. So hopefully I will have that lovely little video done and up for you guys. Since I have to rerecord it. But that'll happen tomorrow.

For now, I'm just going to tell you guys that I am getting my words down. And for all those writers out there, that I hope your words are coming to you to. Hugs all.


NaNo Day 5 - November 5, 2015
Nano Day 7 - November 7, 2015

NaNo Day 5 - November 5, 2015

Day: 5
November 5, 2015
Today's Theme Song: Wings of a Butterfly by HIM

Today was just not a good start for me, again. I got up at a semi-decent hour, around 12:30PM this afternoon but I was still out of it. I hate healing from over doing it. On top of that, today was just not a happy day all around with my jaw.

I still have some jaw issues going on but I'm doing better which is nice.

Tomorrow though shall not be fun. I'm going to be shopping tomorrow when I'm not writing. Whenever my aunt gets over here really which will probably be around noon as usual. Fun times.

But today, I got the first part of a story for a friend done! Yay! I started it yesterday but yesterday was just not happening. No matter how much I wanted it to happen. But I did get in some good words which makes me insanely happy with myself.

It is currently 8:45 PM here and I'm about to turn back to writing chapter 4 of my NaNo WIP, hoping to either finish before I go to bed or before my aunt gets here. Which ever happens.

I'm still doing much better then anticipated. And tomorrow, sometime, I'm going to be doing a "Get to Know Me" video that I will share once I have it done and up.

For now, today's story bits come from Chapter 3!

Perched in bed, computer opened before him on his laptop stand, Markus nibbled at his bottom lip as he thought about what he was going to post while his other computer ran a facial search for him. Alexander had drawn out a picture of the sweet boy that Sara had been reborn as earlier while Markus has napped off their long night. Currently his lover was working on another picture, this one of who they thought might be Adrian, five other pictures in the rough sketch phase spread over his work desk as he worked in the study.

Markus on the other hand was writing on a blog that many thought was an ARG blog with the occasional vlog that was done between him and Alexander based on their own urban legend. It amused him to the extreme but it also allowed him to get out the words that he kept deep within his very soul.

Placing his hands on the keyboards, he started to write, nibbling at his bottom lip in thought.

Ahh, but what could our dear Markus be thinking about? We'll you'll just have to wait for the story to finish now won't you?

I can tell you this, this chapter was a pain to write. So is chapter 4 to be truthful. But I shall persevere!

And that's all you can do. Power through those difficult chapters. Read some stories. Watch a movie. Listen to music. Talk with friends. Stab a stuffed animal when you get frustrated. Keep the stabbing to stuffed, non-alive animals or things please. No need to take it out on the living creatures. 

But keep going. Don't stop. Don't let anything stop you. You are the writing. You have the control. So keep it and keep writing.

Widgets
Nano Day 4 - November 4, 2015
Nano Day 6 - November 6, 2015