Today's Date: June 20, 2016
I have decided to do something a little interesting because I keep seeing this running around, so this is my response to a lot of these. And I keep hearing this shit, so this is my response to things like this.
Don't worry, you shall get an actual update on where I am in regards to setting up my story and preparing for Camp this year here soon. Promise.
Anyways: What NOT To Say To a Writer
All of them make my eyebrow twitch in annoyance. Why? Because it's rude that's why!
If you want to see where a lot of these come from, check out the twitter hashtag #tenthingsnottosaytoawriter or just Google Ten Things Not To Say to a Writer. It's not that hard.
1) You write? That must be a nice hobby for you. My wife/partner/whathaveyou *insert hobby here*
Hobby? What is this hobby thing you're talking about? This is my career! I do this because it's what I love and what I can actually do. It's not a hobby.
Kindly stop comparing me writing to a hobby.
2) “Are you still writing?”
Yes, yes I am.
3) What do you mean, don’t drop by, you’re working? You’re just sitting around making stuff up.
I'm working. What do you not understand about this? If I was trying to do something you consider an actual job, you wouldn't be saying this! I have money to make and only a few hours in each day to do it in, okay?
4) You’re an author? I’ve got at least ten books in me.
Uh, so? I have hundreds of books in me and I'm going to write them all. I don't care if you have them in you. If you do nothing with them, they're not interesting to me.
5) I have a great idea I want you to write for me. Can you draw up a contract detailing how we will split the advance and royalties?
No. Cause that's a lot of work and I don't want to write your supposedly "Great Idea" that is most likely overly cliched make me twitch into an early grave story.
6) It’s irritating to wait a whole year for your next book. Can’t you write any faster?
I'm sorry, did my typing speed annoy you? Does the fact that I have to put a book down after finishing it for a month so I can come back to it with fresh eyes for rewriting and editing purposes annoy you?
Tough. As a writer I have an obligation to make sure whatever I put out is good!
7) I have the most amazing life story, but I don’t have time to write it. Maybe you can write it and we’ll go 50/50 on the royalties.
Me: No.
Person: Why not?
Me: Because I'll be doing ALL of the damn work and you'll be profiting from that. And I know your life. It's duller than that 50 Shades BS. So no.
Person: But...
Me: *sips coffee* No.
Person: *pouts*
Me: *spikes the coffee* No. *goes back to killing off characters*
8) So can I have a free copy of your book?
No. As to why? I need to make money. I don't work for free thank you very much.
9) So what do you really do?
I write. That's what I do. I write. Oh and I make youtube videos with my friend about being broke.
10) Do they even publish books anymore?
Shocking I know but yes, they do create actual real life books still. Surprising I know but there are people who want to have a nice solid book in hand.
Shocking.
11) So you write romance novels?
Person finding out I'm a female writer: So you write romance huh?
Me: Romance? Why? Because I am a female and that's all we can do? I write romance. Very short Male/Male romance stories. But my main genre? Horror.
Horror that will make you wonder where in the world I learned how to screw with a person's mind. Where you're left wondering what that noise you just heard was. Was it the wind? Or was it a murderous creature coming to slowly drain the life out of you.
And make you wonder where I learned to write such things.
Person: *stares in horror*
Me: *sips tea* High school was very informative.
12) I want to write a novel one day.
Uh, that's nice...why not now?
13) Want to edit something for me?
Want to pay me for it? It's 15 dollars an hour currently. And I'm only going to work on it for two hours at a time. It usually takes me about 30 hours to get through a 200 page manuscript to.
14) You're not published? Doesn't this mean that you're not really a writer?
What? Because I'm not published means that I'm somehow not a 'real writer'? Let me tell you, I am a writer for the simple fact that I put words down and then I sit there and beat the story into submissions to get it just right for your viewing pleasure.
15)You need to move on to new material!
No. No I don't. I will write what is fun for me to write and I will make money doing so.
16) That’s really cool that you want to write but I could never give up stability.
Meaning you could never give up your cubical with a possibility of promotion for something that you enjoy and love. Personally, I would love to actually have a job but due to various issues, writing is my career.
Outside of the fact that I love it so much.
17) I loved Fifty Shades of Grey! And the Twilight series!
Those series are so bad it hurts. Twilight is quite frankly a Mary Sue fest gone paranormal, the wolves are shapeshifters, not actual werewolves, and vampires don't sparkle. And Fifty Shades of Abuse is a how to guide to fucking up in the BDSM world.
It's a very BAD fantasy of what the BDSM world should be. And it pisses me off. Don't make me throw you on that bonfire.
18) You should dedicate your book to me.
No. No I should not. Because I don't know you. You only want your name on a book because it'll make you feel good, and because that way you can say you know a published author.
I have my choices for whom the books will be dedicated to.
19) We don't pay, but it's a great opportunity for you to get your name out there!
Uhh, no. No I don't think so. Sorry, but not happening.
If it doesn't come with a pay check it doesn't happen. I have other ways of getting my name out there. Thank you.
Updates
6/14/2016
I am still trying to not write on the story but I have been able to plot out a couple more chapters. I wrote down the summary for chapter 8 and 9 and went "Huh, smut in the first 9 chapters. This is going to be fun". Then...I started writing down pairing ideas.
My next thought? "OMG, this guy is going to get around so much".
Yeah.
Anyways, I have also received the contract for my Forward Motion 2015 Anthology submission from J.A. Marlow. J.A. has been amazing busy what working a new job for the summer and dealing with the loss of their mother.
Soon, very soon, the book shall be published and I'm happy to do this for no money.
Why? Because it supports the one forum that I've discovered that I like the most. So all proceeds from this book goes to upkeep and paying all sorts of things that go into the forum. I am able to publish it elsewhere or even publish it myself in a future collection if I want (which is good since it set off a duology and the scene will make it into book 2 in some form).
I'll keep you updated on what's going on with that and will add a small tidbit when it comes out!
6/17/2016
Ugh! I am not sleeping very well, but I'm still working on creating an outline for the story. I have about a week and a half left before I have to worry about actually writing this darn thing but I'm getting there. Working on watching some anime, getting them off of my list because shit happens.
And that list is amazingly huge. Seriously huge. And some of them are longer than like 6 episodes.
Anyways, I'm getting things done and hopefully I'll get this story at least part of the way done by the time I get to that point. I have no idea how it's going to happen. I really don't.
I'm going to go back to finishing off another story and trying not to cry in horror at not having no extra sleep to keep me from killing people.
I am still trying to not write on the story but I have been able to plot out a couple more chapters. I wrote down the summary for chapter 8 and 9 and went "Huh, smut in the first 9 chapters. This is going to be fun". Then...I started writing down pairing ideas.
My next thought? "OMG, this guy is going to get around so much".
Yeah.
Anyways, I have also received the contract for my Forward Motion 2015 Anthology submission from J.A. Marlow. J.A. has been amazing busy what working a new job for the summer and dealing with the loss of their mother.
Soon, very soon, the book shall be published and I'm happy to do this for no money.
Why? Because it supports the one forum that I've discovered that I like the most. So all proceeds from this book goes to upkeep and paying all sorts of things that go into the forum. I am able to publish it elsewhere or even publish it myself in a future collection if I want (which is good since it set off a duology and the scene will make it into book 2 in some form).
I'll keep you updated on what's going on with that and will add a small tidbit when it comes out!
6/17/2016
Ugh! I am not sleeping very well, but I'm still working on creating an outline for the story. I have about a week and a half left before I have to worry about actually writing this darn thing but I'm getting there. Working on watching some anime, getting them off of my list because shit happens.
And that list is amazingly huge. Seriously huge. And some of them are longer than like 6 episodes.
Anyways, I'm getting things done and hopefully I'll get this story at least part of the way done by the time I get to that point. I have no idea how it's going to happen. I really don't.
I'm going to go back to finishing off another story and trying not to cry in horror at not having no extra sleep to keep me from killing people.
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